It's inevitable. Whether you wait til after the wedding day, or take the plunge before, eventually you will have to do it. MOVE. IN. TOGETHER.
Most of us have shared living quarters before: parents, siblings, college roommates. But living with your significant other is a whole new ballgame. Here are some tips for coping with this adjustment:
- Before the move, go through all your stuff. Decide what to keep, what to donate, and what to sell. Take a good look at the space you are moving into, and decide what can logically fit in that space. This is true if your significant other is moving into your current place as well - before all their boxes arrive, eliminate any extras you can. If both of you have had your own places, you might have two coffee makers, two toasters, etc. Decide whose will be kept, and whose will be sold/donated.
- Have "the money talk" before moving in too. It's better to discuss financial matters ahead of time, and definitely before getting married. Your new spouse's financial picture will also become yours, so you should know all about their income, credit score, credit card debt or student loans, assets like savings and investments, and other financial obligations.
- Also discuss household chores. Will you take a divide and conquer approach, where you'll clean the bathroom and he'll do the laundry? Or maybe you'll do the yard work and she'll handle the finances. However your new life looks to you, you should be sure that your partner is on the same page! This teamwork will save many arguments down the road, and will also lay the groundwork for compromising in the future.
- Don't forget about date night. Or alone time. When you live together, it's easy to become stuck in a rut. Make time for fun activities together outside the house, but don't lose touch with your friends either. Set dates on the calendar for both date time and friend time, and be sure to stick to this habit.